My daughter-in-law sent me the following email regarding simple church and her ten-year-old son, Skyler. I thought y'all would appreciate her experience and thoughts:
As a mom on this untraditional journey, I gotta tell ya…I am always struggling with the guilt (I know, no surprise there!) of not "doing" enough church stuff for my kids. I think stupid things like "are my kids really going to know enough about who God is and being a part of the body by not being in a 'church'?". I know, of course, that going to a building on Sunday assures NOTHING regarding these two things. Then I think more legitimate thoughts like, "Moving around a lot makes it more difficult to connect with believers immediately, how can I encourage this connection for my kids?" I'm instantly reminded that the Holy Spirit is much more powerful than an institution at bringing connections. Then, I think very interesting thoughts like, "Is my faith big enough to inspire a true relationship with Christ in my kids?" (Without the crutch of the institution, I am forced to actually live the life…I don't always like this!) And then, I am reminded of probably the most rational idea in all of this, that really it isn't up to me to "make" my kids believers. Surely, I have a giant influence on how they view religion and God, but ultimately, I (AND institutions, for that matter) are completely powerless to convert anyone. The practice of family church always brings me to that…trusting God…not trying to make things happen…waiting on the Holy Spirit…and how seriously needy I am.
So with all that in mind, I was pleasantly suprised by Skyler at family church yesterday. Mitch said it's time for church. Skyler left for a minute and then came back. He sat down on the couch and said, "I can't think of anything." We were a little confused; "What do you mean?" we asked. Somewhat pensive, he replied, "I can't think of anything to do for church." We told him that he didn't have to do anything, of course.
What struck me is that, he assumes that he will contribute to "church" whenever we gather. How cool is that! I am not saying that he wouldn't be learning valuable things in traditional church, of course. You know I love "church" in whatever format, but how cool is it that he has the foundational belief that when he does participate he is willing to participate actively in the meeting. I don't think he would have gleaned that so much from another format. Needless to say, I was reminded to trust, trust, trust…God continues to teach my babies even in the midst of my chaos, failures, and in the simplicity.
Comments
3 responses to “Children and Simple Church”
When we left the ‘going to church’ routine, my in-laws (pastors) were concerned about what we would do with our kids. In affect they were asking ‘who will raise them in the faith?’. This is so simple it is sad to have to state it – are not parents responsible for modeling and discussing faith with their kids???
My wife and I were certainly uncomfortable trusting a children’s pastor or sunday school teacher or kids church with that responsibility. I don’t have it all figured out, but I know there are rigid, church culture messages that I did not want my kids hearing.
We have done house church for a few years now and have had both really dull devotional times together and really rich times. But in both cases our kids were engaged in scripture, meditation, sharing, communion, journaling, etc. and like your daughter-in-law, God continues to teach my (kids) even in the midst of my chaos, failures, and in the simplicity.
Thanks for sharing, Roger! This was very encouraging to me!
Heh…that’s a cool story. It brings up some interesting questions like how it is that a simple church is supposed to function and use the gifts of children in the process.
I think Jon is getting at something very profound – doing church, real church, is never about entertainment, but about encountering God and each other. As much as we dress that up like a trip to Disneyland with exciting new experiences at every turn, its not…at least not always. Instead, it is often ho-hum, boring, didn’t-get-anything-out-of-that experiences. But those experiences lay the foundation for the others and without the valley, there are no mountaintops.